The Angel and the Devil and Wantan Noodles

When I was little, no older than 5 or 6 years old, my parents would take me to this Wantan noodle shop along Jalan Tengkera for a bowl of Wantan noodles. My favourite then as now, is the "dry" noodles served with strips of char siew pork, blanched choy sum and a bowl of clear thin soup on the side. Now this shop was very popular back in those days and it was usually quite busy when we went there. There was this picture hanging on the wall and as i ate my noodles i would gaze at the picture which showed a classic pose of the Archangel St.Michael vanquishing the Devil. At that time when i was small the picture looked much bigger. It struck me as a rather odd picture but i was nonetheless mesmerised by it, the angelic face of St Michael all pure all pale and looking rather stern, looking down on the Devil whose head was being trampled under St Michael's foot. I pitied the Devil, i thought "now why would someone do this to someone else? That fellow is a tad dirty-looking and dark-complexioned and he has horns and he does look fearful, but so does that fellow who is stepping on him." That picture locked itself into my mind and i'd always remember it even long after we had stopped going to the shop and long after i'd grown up. The shop with the picture, the smell and tastes of noodles, the gravy sweet and tasty, me munching on noodles and looking at that picture which was so over-aweing and yet so odd in such a little shop as this. But it is a very popular picture. My wife's family home has the same picture hanging on the front entrance of the house. Now that i'd grown much older and read about St Michael as God's head bouncer, i understand the meaning of that picture which is to symbolise the triumph of good over evil. i take comfort in that and i have even invoked the archangel Michael in prayer. Whether that is proper or not i am not quite sure, but i am told by those who know that God is not quite ready yet to send St Michael down to do battle with the forces of darkness. Not quite ready yet.

the Ugly Chinaman & the crisis of Chinese culture

(pictures of author Bo Yang and the cover of his famous book)

I had been looking for a copy of Bo Yang's "the Ugly Chinaman and the crisis of Chinese Culture" for the past couple of months without much success until recently when i finally managed to get hold of a used copy from my cousin in Kuala Lumpur who graciously couriered it to me. Bo Yang or Guo DingSheng his real name, is a mainland-born Chinese writer based in Taiwan who passed away on 28th April 2008. His works include a whole tonne of essays and not a few novels but he is best known for his book of the abovenamed title which was published in 1985 (translated into English in 1992)some 9 years after he had been released from jail in Taiwan for allegedly penning a "Popeye" cartoon parody of then Taiwanese president Chiang Kai Shek and his son and heir-apparent Chiang Ching Kuok. During prison Bo Yang had much time for reflection and so he wrote about what he thought to be the problems with Chinese culture. I have only read 20 pages of his book so far and i was laughing from page to page because what Bo Yang wrote was so very true and so very very funny. His observations of Chinese compatriots at home and abroad are humorous, witty and very honest. So influential was his book that the Chinese Communist hardliners on mainland China, following the quashing of mass student protests in Tiananmen square in 1986, used it as an excuse to purge Hu Yao Bang the former reformist Chinese leader because Hu had publicly encouraged people to read Bo Yang's book. This book is currently out of print and it retails on amazon.com used copy for US$99. My own enquiries have turned up various offers of pricey-ness ranging from $195 for a used copy from the USA (but cancelled because they wouldn't deal with Malaysia due to credit card fraud issues), RM350 for a used copy with scribblings on the margins and RM485 for a better conditioned used copy, the latter 2 from the UK and shipping to Malaysia another RM45. In the end, it was my own family ties that enabled me to finally read this book. But i do remember that this book was widely sold during the early to late 1990s, it was easily available in almost any English language bookstore you walked into. In his book, Bo Yang compares chinese culture to the soy paste vat. A soy paste vat is something very Chinese and in it the soy paste is left to decompose and ferment for sometime to yield the final product which is soy sauce. The metaphors and symbolism of Bo Yang's work are price-less and this is something that everybody who is interested in Chinese culture and things chinese should make as compulsory reading. But really no compulsion is required here as the book is extremely entertaining and easy to read.

Baby Baby

Children or babies are like a change of new batteries. They are a source of renewal when we feel tired and worn-out. At the ripe old age of 40 i became the father of a bouncing baby girl with a tendency to regurgitate milk every time after feeding. She vomits like me, maybe. I remember years ago before children ever came into our family - one day while i was driving out with Mom on a warm dry Saturday afternoon lesiurely looking out at half empty streets in Malacca heading to the pasar malam, just me and Mom the two of us. Mom said that she was sure that the Chinese fortune tellers were wrong, they had predicted her to be "Lao Shui Man Soon" (having many many grandchildren in her old age). Here she was, already past 60 with nary a baby/grandchild to hold. My brother then had been married for a few years but my sister-in-law was at the time still working in England. I was still single with no steady girlfriend or prospects in sight - still working for the family business, still dependent on old Mom and Dad. And fast into my 30s. Fast forward 9 years later Mom and Dad have 6 grand kids to date with 1 more on the way next month from my sister. That makes a grand total of 7 grandkids next Chinese New Year, with 2 oxen being born in 2009 alone. How things change. Now whenever my brother and sister come home with their kids, the house is full of children's laughter and tearing around all over the place. I remember feeling old, tired, worn-out during that Saturday afternoon drive to pasar malam with Mom. On 1st September this year, after I had been married for almost 2 years Hannah was born. Now that I have my own child, my wife and i are getting used to waking up in the night to tend to Hannah, to burp her after each feeding, to cradle her to sleep (she hates to be put in the cot to sleep on her own), to bath her, to clean her. It's a demanding job perhaps moreso for my wife than for me, but i'm not complaining over the sleepless nights i have had to endure. I've just changed new batteries ;-)

Gloss-nost

We practise gloss-nost. Gloss-nost as opposed to former Soviet Premier and Cold War liberator Mr Mikhail Gorbachev's Glasnost, does not mean open-ness transparency and reform. Gloss-nost here means a glossing over what is the surface of things, a shallow-ness in approach to things, the touching of surface level only without going into the substance of matters. For example, 1Malaysia as espoused by the government of late to mean one-ness of all Malaysians united and strong. But then on the other hand, politicians including a former premier have come out fighting for the rights of one race above all others. They struggle for one race and no one else. They are not bothered by what the other races think. They espouse the Mastery of the one race. This sloganeering and putting forth of empty platitudes has become a regular feature of every new government to come into power in Malaysia. Gloss-nost.

But Gloss-nost is not merely confined to the Malaysian government. It cuts across the political divide to include members of the Opposition. For example, Beyonce's concert to Malaysia. Certain elements in PAS protest on "moral grounds". They object that Beyonce's dressing, the showing of flesh, her act will be suggestive in some ways and will tend to corrupt Malaysian youth. Nevermind that Beyonce is a highly talented singer who was invited to sing at the US President's Inauguration Ball where she was watched by millions to be in tears while rendering a heart-felt version of Ella Fitzgerald's "At Last" as newly-elected and the first-ever black American President Barack Obama waltzed to the tune with First Lady Michelle Obama. Nevermind that other notable US-based singers such as Gwen Stefani have obliged us, bending over backwards as it seems, to tone down on their dressing and acts, to cover up more flesh in our humid and warm tropical climate if only just to suit Malaysian cultural mores. Nevermind that the concert is only open to those who actually buy tickets to go and watch it, the vast majority of whom will be adults and not a few non-Muslims. Nevermind that Malaysia is a multi-ethnic, multi-religious country. The views of the vocal stupid few based on the narrowest most shallow/superficial interpretation of religion, never mind the substance, is to cow all else into submission. Gloss-nost.

The Auditor-General's 2008 report as expected, brings to light more instances of over-charging and rampant corruption in government disbursements and spending. How else do you account for an out-of-date-model laptop that costs RM42,320(equivalent to US$12,513 at today's exchange rate), purchased stools that don't match with contracted specifications, government vehicles' maintenance over 3 times the market rates charges, etc etc etc? But I fully expect that nothing will be done to rectify this problem. A few sympathetic and "tut-tut" statements from the top echelons of government shall be enough to re-assure us that, rest assured, the government FIRMLY DISAPPROVES of such profligate waste of public funds. Perhaps a slap on the wrist or a show trial of one or two expendable small fries will be thrown in for good measure. Just to show what's been done. The prosecuted will also likely be found not guilty at the end of the day. Everyone is happy, case closed. Wait until next year's Auditor General's Report and see lah. Business as usual in the meantime. Gloss-nost.

It's ok, waste of public funds? Believe you me, the government is a money tree and there's plenty plenty plenty more where those come from, my friend. The pool of tax payers/funds is seemingly inexhaustible.

Gloss-nost is a way of life in Malaysia. We don't need to think very much thanks to Gloss-nost. We can remain rent-collectors, dividend drawers, expect to be paid for doing nothing thanks to Gloss-nost. We have the most wonderful PR job in the world to depict our happy little country as living in a perpetual summer of racial harmony and communal bliss and all other nations are oh so eager to emulate our fine example. We shall teach them a thing or two. About Gloss-nost.

We are Malaysians so beware!

Once again when asked though email correspondence where i am from, i answer "Malaysia". It's funny how when you meet people online and tell them that you're from Malaysia they suddenly lose all further interest to interact with you or maybe that's just the impression i always get. Malaysians cannot, from Malaysia, buy stuff from ebay in USA or used books, cds from USA because of credit card fraud issues. Malaysians over-stay in Britain and work illegally there and in other countries such as Japan, USA, Australia. Malaysian Chinese make up over 98% of all over-stayers in Britain. Is it any wonder that people are afraid when we tell them that we're Malaysians? Our leaders until very recently have the habit of always pissing off the West in general and Israel in particular. The most wanted Al Qaeda-linked terrorist network in South East Asia was led by a Malaysian who was shot dead by Indonesian police recently. When i travel abroad and use my credit card i have no problems at all with fraudulent charges or card fraud. Back home my direct debit card has been ripped off after i used it at a supermarket. I ask myself why do we do these things. Why do we go overseas and do really bad things, things that we would not do at home because we know we'll suffer the consequences. The bad publicity we get is all of our own doing. Nobody is out to bad lip us. No one is out to especially get Malaysia or Malaysians in general. If we have a bad rap it is because of our bad record and we deserve it. It's not a bum rap. Why must Malaysians travel all the way to UK to work in some dingy restaurant when there are plenty of job opportunities back home? Why must we do all sorts of stupid hare-brained things from drugs mule-ing to people trafficking to credit card fraud and besmirch our reputation abroad? And while all of these things are happening the newspapers back home paint a glowing picture of "Malaysia truly Asia" and how we all live in harmony. Race-baiting, self-serving politicians, corrupt cops, corruption from the bottom to the top are all part and parcel of everyday life in Malaysia. I know it, you know it, anybody with half a brain knows it. But so many of us are still in denial mode. It's tragic. It's sad. When can we be honest and look at ourselves in the mirror and say: "Look, this shit has gone on far enough. Stop it. No more from hereon. I'm watching you."